Chatting

My mom met a guy online last December, and they have been dating ever since.  He is super nice, and he treats her the way she deserves to be treated, with love and respect.  I was always against meeting guys online, even though my therapist seems to think I should take a crack at it myself, because I always thought it was just weird, desperate people on those sites who couldn't meet anyone in the real world.  Now I know that online dating is just a means to an end.  I consider it this day and ages version of picking up a guy in the supermarket or a bar, only now you know way more about them before even speaking to them for the first time.

Before online dating sites existed, men and women would meet in free chat sites.  I never went on any of these, either, but I do know people who spent hours talking to complete strangers everyday.   I guess in their own way, chat sites can help you connect with people who share the same interests as you.  I imagine there are chat rooms devoted to all kinds of things.  I wonder how weird it would be to try and find someone online who loves elephants as much as I do?

I had no idea that there were chat room for kids, and to be honest, I'm not sure I would want my kids chatting online with complete strangers unless I thoroughly checked out the site first myself, making sure it is secure and that there is no way that their identities could be discovered.  Even then, I would probably sit right there with them as they chatted.  There are too many sick people in this world who pretend to be someone other than who they really are online.

You can never be too careful, especially when it comes to your kids.

I'm Going To Be Doing A Lot More Checking From Now On

When I signed into Facebook this morning, I found a message from one of my favorite people, alerting me to the fact that she found my 14 year old son on a dating site.  Of course I checked it out immediately, and sure enough, he shows up as someone who has been to the site, though he doesn't have a profile.  I will be asking him about it when he gets home from school, and I might be having to monitor his online activity a little more closely.  I don't want to end up finding out down the road that he has been using roulette chat or visiting other "off limit" sites.  I understand that he is a curious young man, but he may not understand how these things can gt him into trouble.

I am so grateful that I have friends who look out for me and my family.  Had this person not alerted me, I probably never would have known what Ryan has been up to. 

And to the person who messaged me; you know who you are.  You also know that I love you, and I thank you for trying to help protect my kids.

December 22, 1994

On this day, fifteen years ago, I met my husband. I know I have told this story before, but for those of you who are new, I am going to share it again. For those of you who are regulars, you'll have to suffer through it one more time! lol!

I had moved to SC from NY in April of that year, after a three and a half year long relationship ended. I was broken hearted, and had no idea what direction my life was going to take. I was depressed, and spent the next few months just moping around my moms house. I finally got a job working fast food, and made some great friends. A few of these friends decided it was time for me to find someone new, and they made it their mission to make that happen. The first guy I was set up with was my age, and had a little boy. We talked on the phone for a few weeks before we ever met, and we got along great. We had a lot in common, and I was looking forward to spending time with him. I think it was at this point where I finally realized what it's like for people who hook up online in free vampire chat rooms or on dating sites. I was amazed that I could get to know someone so well by just talking to them, and never actually meeting them.

Well, a few weeks later, he decided to come to where I work, so we could meet face to face. Now, back then I was a skinny minnie with a nice figure (I had just lost about 50 pounds) and I was very confident. He comes in the store, and we "met", and then he left.

And he never called me again.

To this day I am still baffled, because I am not by any means ugly (tooting my own horn here). The friend who set us up claims that he drove by my moms house after he left the store, and decided that I was too "rich" for him. He didn't think he would fit into my world. Yeah, okay. I was working fast food and living in my moms house! I was not rich by any stretch of the imagination. But, whatever. It was his loss, and it was not soon after this that I met my husband.

When my best friend at the time decided she knew the perfect guy for me, I was hesitant. I mean, I had just been "dumped" by a guy right after he got a look at me, and I didn't really want to go through that again. But, she was persistent, and a week later Junior called me. He wanted to meet at a bar, and I told him I didn't drive. He laughed, and then agreed to pick me up. We had a nice time at the bar, talking, but it just wasn't my cup of tea. I had never been a big drinker, and as most of you know, my husband used to be an alcoholic. So we left there, and just drove around talking.

After that night, we were pretty much inseparable. His family wasn't exactly welcoming to me, and some of my family had issues with him. To be honest, he brought that on himself, and has been paying for it for the last fifteen years. He proposed on my birthday in February, and it was that night that we conceived Ryan. (I am sure you were dying to know that!) We were married on June 22, 1995, exactly six months after we met. It was a small, civil ceremony at the courthouse, because I was pretty pregnant by then. People said we wouldn't last a year, and here we are, fifteen years and three kids later, still going strong. Not bad for a blind date, right?

So when people tell me they met their significant others online, in chat rooms, or on a blind date, I get it. I know it's possible to find the one you are meant to be with in an unconventional way.

I'm living proof of that!

Who's Your Vampire?

Brandi has this friend, Aleah. Last month, right before Brandi was out for those six days, Aleah told her that she was a vampire. Brandi, of course, didn't believe her, and the whole time she was out of school, she worried about this. Not because she believed Aleah, but because she wanted to PROVE that Aleah was lying. (if you know Brandi at all, you know this is normal for her)

A few days into Brandcation (as Brandi called her sick time) she figured it out. She was going to ask Aleah to show her her fangs. That would prove once and for all that Aleah was NOT a vampire.

Brandi comes home from school that first day back, and tells me that Aleah is "one smart cookie". When Brandi asked to see her fangs, Aleah told her that only grown up vampires, like her parents, have fangs, and that hers were still coming in. She said she wouldn't have her full set until she was 12. (I am loving the imagination on this kid, BTW)

Since then, Brandi refers to her as "vampire chick". She is still trying to figure out a way to prove Aleah is lying, but for now seems to have accepted the fact that she will have to wait until they are 12 too see if the fangs come in.

Well, last night at Brandi's program, we were walking out of the gym when a little blond girl with blue eyes starts waving like mad at my girls. Brandi looks at me and says, "vampire chick".

I was shocked, and I don't know why, but I was not expecting her to be blond. I was picturing a dark haired, brown eyed girl. I think it's all the Twilight. I hear vampire, I see Edward in my head. Weird, I know.

If you think of Edward too, and want to discuss your fascination or maybe even meet a "real" vampire like Aleah's parents, check out vampire chat. I may have to check this out, just because I am curious if there are adults out there who really think they are vampires. The site is 100% free, and you can even use your webcam. This means I can really check out some of these people. Do they dress in black and wear black lipstick? Do they really put in some fangs and get into the roll of "vampire"? It definitely has my curiosity peaked.

Can You Name Every State?

I am apparently working my way through every state, letting you know about chat rooms. I should have started with the arizona chat lines, and worked my way to Wyoming. I used to be able to name every state; I wonder if I can still do it. I might have to try and see.

Finding Love

I have been writing a lot lately about chat rooms, and how interesting it is that each state has their own. You can check out rhode island chat lines, or any other state's chat rooms, and meet interesting people. Most of you know that I met my husband on a blind date, so I know first hand that love happens, no matter where you are looking for it.

The Poconos

I remember, when I was younger, spending a week each summer at a Christian retreat in the Poconos with my grandparents. I remember making friends, and becoming pen pals with very interesting girls. The first year, there was a group from an Oriental church, and my sister and I became fast friends with a couple of the girls. We would attend church every day, and we would sit with them. I remember my grandparents commenting on how funny we looked; two blond heads in a sea of black headed children.

I miss writing letters to old friends. Nowadays there are pennsylvania chat rooms
which is kind of like having a pen pal, because you get to know someone without "knowing" them, know what I mean?

Las Vegas

When I think of Nevada, I think of Las Vegas.

Sin City.

What Happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.

"If you get married in Vegas, you are only married in Vegas", said Pheobe Buffet, on an episode of friends. How wrong she was!

I have never been myself, but imagine it is quite a sight to see. I imagine there are some colorful people who live there, too. If you want to meet one of them, check out nevada chat rooms. They are free to join, and you can browse peoples profiles and video chat.

I don't think I could live with all the crowds and that lifestyle, so I am perfectly content to stay here in South Carolina. Although, it might make a fun place to go on vacation.

Visiting new Orleans

I am going to start hanging out in louisiana chat rooms. You know why? Because I want to visit New Orleans someday, and I am hoping to make a friend there. What could be better than having someone who lives there show us around? That's right, I said us. I plan on being totally honest with whoever I meet, letting them know I am not interested in anything more than friendship. That's okay in chat rooms, right?

Meeting Your Soul Mate, Locally

It used to be when you join a chat room online, most were nationwide, or even worldwide. When you met someone, you did't know if they lived 5 minutes, or 5 hours away. That has changed recently, though, and with every state having it's own chat room. If you live in NC, you can go into a north carolina chat and find someone local. The nationwide chat rooms are still around, but this is a better option if you want to find someone who lives close by.

Senior Dating

As people get older, they tend to migrate south. Not all people, but Florida is known to have it's share of seniors. I wonder if any of them spend time in florida chat rooms? I bet it's a nice way to meet other people who share their interests. I would recommend using your webcam, though, so you can see exactly who you are talking to.

Meeting Local Singles

Did you know that each state has it's own chat room, where you can meet singles in your area? I can check out south carolina chat for free, and meet people in my own area. Makes dating a little easier, right? At least you know that you won't have to travel too far to meet that someone special.

Love The Accent

What do you think the odds are that if I went into a sydney chat room I would meet someone as hot as Keith Urban? Not that I'm looking, but I just love the way people from Australia talk. It's so sexy. Don't you agree? These chat rooms are free, so I could just hop on my web cam and see how hot all those Australian guys are. Maybe Keith has a look alike somewhere?

Dating?

How old is old enough to date?

Ryan will be turning 14 soon, and he has started showing an interest in having a girlfriend. I know at this age, having a girlfriend means talking on the phone, maybe holding hands in school, and if he's really lucky, a kiss now and then.

I am not sure if I am ready for this, especially because Kasi is right behind him. She'll be 13 in May. I remember when I was 13, having a boyfriend was the dream of me and all my girlfriends. I didn't "date" until I was in HS, and I want to set those same guidelines for my kids. But, I know dating and having a boyfriend/girlfriend are two different things at this age.

I want them to have healthy relationships. I want them to love and be loved. I just don't think it needs to happen at 13 or 14. I think maybe they should wait until they are in their 30's, and they can meet people in asian chat rooms or something. They can use the free video chat, and socialize online. I know that is not realistic to think I can make them wait that long, but I do want them to at least be 16.

Junior, on the other hand, says they will be 40 before they can date, especially the girls.

Tell me, what age did you allow your kids to have a boyfriend/girlfriend, or to date?

Black

I love wearing black. Most of my clothes are either black, or dark blue. I think it goes back to when I read an article saying that dark clothes make you appear thinner. I don't know that I agree with that, but I do think dark clothes hide fat rolls better than light colored clothes.

Now, just because I prefer dark clothes doesn't mean I am "goth" in any way, or that I spend time in free gothic chat rooms. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying there is anything wrong with chat rooms. They are a great place to meet people who share your interests. In fact, I know of quite a few people who have met their significant others this way.

How Did You Two Meet?

Do you have a special story about how you a met your significant other? Junior and I were set up on a blind date, and that was almost fifteen years ago. He took me to a bar, and that was the one and only time we went out drinking. I know these days it is getting harder and harder to find the person you were meant to be with. People are turning to christian singles chat rooms to find their soul mates. Chat rooms are great, especially if you use the free video chat option. You can see and talk to someone who shares your interests.

Are you still looking for that someone special, or do you already have your special story?

Show Me Your Muscles

Do you like guys who have muscles, or a you a guy who likes to show off his muscles? If so, check out bodybuilding chat. You can meet up with people who share your interest in bodybuilding, even video chatting for free. I like a man with a little meat on his bones, but am not too attracted to guys who have huge muscles. I prefer the natural look of muscles.

These days you can find chat rooms for every interest. It's nice that there are places you can connect with people who like the same things as you do. Who knows. You might find the person you are meant to be with.

Love Tattoos?

Do you have tattoos? I don't. I would love to get a little elephant on my ankle, or something, but the fear of the pain keeps me tattoo free. I do, however, love seeing tattoos on other people. Most times you can get a sense of their life by the pictures drawn on their bodies. If you love tattoos, too, check out tattoo chat rooms. This is a place where you can get online and brag about your body art, or admire other peoples. It's free to use their video chat, which is a great way to see what other people have. It's a great place for tattoo fanatics to get together.

Getting Married

A friend of mine is getting married. She has been dreaming about this for years, and has finally found a good man. I am not going to be in the wedding, which is my choice, not hers. I have issues with fitting in the bridesmaid dresses, so I will witness the union in the pew.

My friend is obsessed with everything wedding related, and she has every right to be. She just drives me crazy sometimes, going on and on about the flowers. Maybe it's because I didn't have a real wedding, but I don't care that much about flowers, or photographers. I suggested she get online and join a free wedding chat room, where she can find other people about to tie the knot, who would be happy to compare notes with her.

It would at least give me a temporary break from listening to her go on and on.

Keeping Busy

It is raining again, complete with tornado and thunderstorm warnings. Ryan was just looking out the front door, and said the lightning was pretty bad. Usually I would get off the computer if there is bad lightning, but I have too much to do. We'll just hope I don't fry my computer, okay?

My mom is going tomorrow to look at that house with the pool and shop out back. Her realtor told her someone had already put in an offer, but that it was really low. I think if she likes the house, she might try and put in an offer, too. She has had so many close calls with houses in the past few months. If this one is meant to be hers, then she will get it. I hope she is able to find something soon. I know she doesn't spend her nights in senior chat rooms online, even though she is as bad as me about being online. She needs something to keep her busy, and when she finally buys a house, she will be able to put her time into fixing it up the way she wants it. Most of her things have been in storage for over a year, so it will be like Christmas for her when she gets to unpack them all.

I'm just not looking forward to helping her move again. But I will, cause she's my mom, and I love her.