I just took my first nap of the new year. It's raining outside and I'm not feeling the best, so when Kasi and I tried to watch a scary movie, I fell asleep. Why is it that rain can make a person sleepy?
Anyway, I have decided to not make any resolutions this year. What's the point? It seems to me like I never keep them anyway. Instead, I am going to start the new year doing one thing.
Forgiving.
There are lots of things I feel like I can't let go of, and I am letting them get in the way of moving on. In 2010, I finally forgave myself for being overweight, and I accepted the fact that I am who I am. I don't want to spend another year of my life trying to change who I am. Sure, I am going to continue playing the wii fit, and hopefully lose a few more pounds, but I refuse to let that become the focus of my daily life.
I forgive the person who feels like she always has to find fault in everything I do in order to make herself feel better. If your life is so sad that all you have to do all day is write about me and how cold hearted and horrible I am, well, then, that's your deal. Just know that I forgive you for all the nasty things you have written about me, and if you ever want to apologize and move forward, well, you know where to find me.
I forgive my father in law, too, for hating me simply because I am a yankee. Some of you know that he is dying. In fact, from what we have learned, he doesn't have very long left. I never stood a chance with this man, simply because I am from NY and I married his southern son. Over the years, I kind of developed a relationship with him, though I am not sure I'd call it a good one. I think it's more like he learned to tolerate me. I always called him Grumpy. It was my nickname for him. I wish I could get my husband to forgive him as well, but that's a whole other issue.
I am also going to ask forgiveness for the wrong I have done to others. I can not think of anything specific, but I am not perfect. I am sure I have done things to hurt other people, and for that, I deeply apologize. I want to start this year with a clean slate.
This year, I only have room in my heart for love, not hate.
16 comments:
extremely well written! And what a great idea :) I think I may join you on this one....
As for Junior...I understand. To some extent i'm where he is.
Well done !
Beautifully said, Jenn. I can only hope to follow your example because I really need to do that in my life, too.
Trish ~ thanks. I know Junior is a long way from forgiving his parents for the way they have treated him. I have tried several times (unsuccessfully) to get him to make amends. I can only do so much, and no matter what I do, I will never be good enough for his family. It's their loss, though, cause I'm awesome! :)
Dawn ~ Thanks! :D
Stacey ~ I think we all have a little forgiving to do, as well as asking for forgiveness. I just hope I can keep this attitude for the entire year. We shall see...
Life is hard and holding hate just makes it harder. I'm sure you will be able to do this. You are wonderful just the way you are and very special. Never forget that.
Thanks Tammy. It has taken me a long time to learn this. Last year, I learned to accept a lot of things that I can not change, and this year, it is time to forgive.
Beautiful post and thoughts for a new year. Forgiving is oftentimes difficult but always rewarding. Wishing you and your family all the best in 2011 Jen.
redkathy ~ same to you!
You have a great post on forgiveness. I only hope that most of us can follow your example. Life is too short to be unforgiving.
Karen ~ You're right...life is too short to be unforgiving. I just hope I can continue to forgive for the entire year, and beyond.
this is tough one for me as well. Maybe some day I will reach the point of letting go. Just not there yet.
Sandi ~ it has taken me a while to get here, too, but I finally decided that I will no longer allow them to have a hold on me.
Did I just read, in the comments on Stacey's blog, that your fil passed away? If so, I pray that your husband will find peace. It is not his fault that his family was/is so negative. I hope he can move on with no regrets.
Karen ~ yeah, he passed away yesterday morning. I have a feeling it's going to be a rough couple of days.
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