Sunday, September 4, 2011

Bad Decisions, That's Alright


Yes, I am quoting a Pink song, who happens to be my new favorite singer. And no, that picture up there has nothing to do with this post, but I found it on my camera from a trip to the zoo a few months ago, and it's adorable...I mean, a monkey and it's baby...so I just had to share it. But anyway, I used to listen to only country music, but when I started driving all day, every day, it became really annoying to listen to the same songs over and over again every day.  My van doesn't have a CD player, or a way for me to plug in my MP3, so I started to randomly listen to different radio stations. The first toime I heard Perfect by Pink, I was hooked.  She is awesome.

I think I was talking about bad decisions. We've all made them.  Some of us have made more than others, and recently, I made a really, really bad decision.


I started smoking again.


I hate it.  I don't know why I do it, but I do.  At first I blamed all the stress in my life.  I was, and am, struggling with money, and I worry about it all the time.  Smoking hasn't helped the issue, because cigarettes are not cheap, which means I am spending money that I can't really spare on them. 


It's a vicious cycle.  I remember how easy it was for me to quit 10 years ago, but I am having a hard time this go around.  I wake up every morning convinced I can quit that day, but it hasn't happened yet.  I know that if I don't stop, I am going to end up sick.  Really sick.  We all know what can happen to smokers.

I really need to quit.

11 comments:

Donna said...

Wow...not good after 10 years! I still smoke too...disgusting!
Stop while you Still can!!! Please....Driving doesn't help, I know....Here's hoping you can find what I Never have...
(((HUG)))

jenn said...

Miss Donna ~ I've known you all these years and never knew you smoked. I knew Crystal does, but not you. I wish I never smoked that first one a few months ago...

Karen said...

Oh no! Change your habit so it doesn't trigger the need for a cigarette. It is so hard, I would assume.

Catch My Words said...

Habits are so hard to break; however, if you did it once, you can do it again.

Joyce
http://joycelansky.blogspot.com

Da Dude said...

Jenn, quitting smoking is never easy. I quit, for the final time, about 30 years ago. Guess what. I still get a craving for a cigarette every once in a while.

Hope you had a great holiday weekend.

jenn said...

Karen ~ I wish it would be that easy...

jenn said...

Joyce ~ the last time I quit, I was pregnant, so there was a good reason...this time, it's harder to do it just for myself.

jenn said...

Da Dude ~ the funny thing is, I never even craved a cigarette in the 10 years I quit...until a couple of months ago when all my car trouble started, and money got tight, and life just got hectic and stressful...I want to quit so bad! I hope I find the strength to quit again soon.

Hope you are enjoying your holiday weekend as well!

bcmomtoo said...

I love Pink!!!!

Sorry to hear about the smoking. As with everything else you do - do it for your kids. To quote an article I posted last week: "Smokers can argue all they want about the effects of second-hand smoke, but the facts say that smoke contains 250 toxic chemicals. It causes lung cancer and heart disease in non-smokers and breathing problems like asthma in children. It can harm anyone who's breathing, and most of all those who are close to you. Also, a 2009 Harvard School of Public Health study found that children who were 12 or younger when their parents were smoking were nearly four times more likely to start smoking than the children of nonsmokers. Do you really want to be the reason your child starts smoking?"

And then there's the money issue...

You can do it! Look at all you've accomplished in the last few months. This should be nothing, right? After all, this is something you've done before.

jenn said...

Anna ~ I know...I smoke outside...I only do it in the house on the weekends the kids are with their dad...but you are right...I have done this before, and i will do it again.

Lukas Andi said...

Wow...not good after 10 years! I still smoke too...disgusting!