I have written and erased, rewritten and erased this post quite a few times this morning. The words just don't want to come out right, and everything I try to write just sounds wrong. If you have been a reader for a while, you know that my husband did not have the best relationship with his dad, and about two and a half years ago, we walked away and cut contact with him. In fact, my husband decided to cut ties with his entire family.
This did not mean that he stopped caring about these people. They are his family. It just meant he got to a point in his life where he needed to put himself around positive influences, not negative ones. The news of his father's passing was not easy for him to hear. No matter what happened in the past, this man was his father. Now, there is no chance of ever reconciling. He will never hear his dad tell him he loves him. He will never hear his dad tell him he is proud of the man he has become. And this breaks my heart.
We will continue to go to therapy, and hopefully one day my sweet husband can move past this. For now, we will take things day by day, and hopefully find a way for him to heal.
22 comments:
I am so sorry for your loss. I hope your husband can heal quickly. I have had similar problems with family and it is a very hard thing to deal with.
(((Big hugs))) I'm so sorry for your loss. Hopefully will heal quickly.
We have often had this discussion about my dad. When we thought he was going to kill himself recently, my husband was like "Big deal, blah, blah, blah" and although my dad has done a lot of horrible stuff to me, he is still my dad and when he passes, it certainly won't be easy.
Praying for you guys!
My condolences for your loss.
Thinking of you guys !! I am sure that therapy will help !! Let me know if you need anything! *HUGS*
My father went through this as well. He cut ties with his dad when he walked out on them when he was a teenager, after a lifetime of beating and abusing everyone in the house. As an old man, when I was a teen, he tried to re-enter our lives, but my dad wasn't going to allow it. But when his father died, it still hit him quite hard.
My condolences.
I am sorry sorry for your loss. I understand your husband's pain, as i was disconnected from my own dad when he passed away. I do hope your husband finds a way to heal and know that his father did love him, even if he didn't get to hear it from him.
My heart goes out to you and Junior. I will keep you all in my prayers. {{{hugs}}}
It is always hard to lose someone. Words alone never quite help in the way that you would like them to. Alone they are inadequate but sadly they are at times like this often all we can offer. I am so sorry for your sad loss.
For reasons too complicated to get into in a blog comment, I understand a little bit about what your husband is going through, and he just needs time, self-honesty and the support of his family... and I think he does have all of that. Although it does not make it any easier for him, I am sorry for his loss.
My prayers are with your family.
Oh honey, I'm so sorry for your loss. My prayers are with you and your family through these difficult days...
God Bless,
Maitri
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I worry about this for My mom, who also cut ties with her family. She had to.. It was a very destructive relationship.. with multiple people, her brothers, her mother. I am scared that when they pass, it will be tremendously hard on her. Just because you don't talk to them anymore, does not mean the hurt is gone.
I'm very sorry for the loss and I do understand. I'm not on the greatest terms with my birth mom. I pretty much cut ties myself because of her issues...but I think about this happening all the time. Regardless of her behavior I don't want it to ever end this way. I do hope that he can get past it emotionally. I know it must be very hard.
Jenn, my condolences go out to your family. I know this has got to be a very sad and uncomfortable time. I hope some day soon Junior can find some peace when he reflects back on his relationship with his dad. (((hugs!)))
Sorry for the loss your family has suffered, and hopefully the therapy can help your hubby.
I'm sorry to read about your loss,it is unfortunate that your husband was estranged from his father at this time.
I hope you all get through this in time and love will shine through :-)
Oh, I'm so sorry for your loss, my thoughts are with you and yours.
sorry for your loss
We're proud of you Olin, of who you have become, and who you have raised. Not many people would step back and look at a child like Jacob and see who he is. Or a lot of kids who look past his differences. Yet tonight Ryan put together a puzzle, and Kasi admired his track :)
Thank You
I am sorry to hear of your loss. My heartfelt condolences to you and your family especially to your husband.
Hang in there time will help heal your hubby. My prayers are with your family.
Post a Comment