Dreaming

Have you ever thought about packing up all of your belongings and starting over somewhere you have never been before, and no one knows who you are? I have those thoughts sometimes, especially on days like today, where everything seemed to go wrong.  I won't go into specifics, but let's just say I messed up at work this morning, and called my boss and told him to fire me.  He didn't, of course, but that was just the beginning to a pretty horrible day.

It's days like these that I think about Flats to rent Glasgow, because I can pretty much guarantee that no one would know me there.  I could take the kids, run away, and never look back.  Of course, I would let their dad know where we were, and my family, but I would be content to be on my own.  I would never really do this, but sometimes it is nice to dream.  I could spend hours searching for Flats to rent Edinburgh or Flats to rent Aberdeen online, because these properties are beautiful! I am having a little trouble figuring out exactly how much they cost, because the price is not listed in American currency.  I bet if I searched for a converter online I would see that all these places are way out of my price range.  But, like I said, a girl can dream, right?

One Of My Dreams

On the 20th of this month it will be an entire year since my husband left.  Some days it feels like he has only been gone a few days, and then there are days I can not even remember what my life was like back then.  Weird, I know.  I'm not that person anymore, and I am excited to see what my future holds.

I do a lot of dreaming about that.  My biggest dream is to have a place of my own for me and the kids.  I know that will not happen anytime soon, but someday, I want to be able to buy my own home.  I have ideas about how I will decorate it, too.  Some days, I browse the internet, looking for inspiration.  This morning, I found this light fixture, and I fell in love with it. What do you think?

I know it's very modern lighting, but it also has an almost castle-like feel to it.  I think it's the look of the candles. I can see it hanging in my foyer, right inside my front door.  Of course, my foyer will have a very high ceiling, with a window above the front door so this fixture can be seen from outside the house as well.  I'll also have to find modern outdoor lighting to compliment it, but that shouldn't be too hard.

A New Bed

This time of year, everyone starts thinking about Christmas.  I know I have.  I have also started thinking about how much money I am going to get back when I file my taxes next year.  I have a wish list, and I am hoping that I will be able to get at least a few things off my list when all is said and done, whether it be at Christmas or in February.

This may sound crazy, but the biggest thing I am looking forward to is a new bed.  When I moved into my apartment, that was one of the things that I just couldn't bring with me.  I didn't want to sleep in that bed anymore because I had slept in it with my ex.  I am now sleeping on the bottom mattress from my girls bunk bed.  I have it sitting on the floor in my bedroom.  What I really want to get is a king sized bed with egyptian cotton sheets and lots and lots of pillows.  Brandi has been sleeping with me since she was about six months old, and I think the time is coming when she needs to start sleeping in her own bed.  I mean, the kid is going to be 10 next month.  I told her when I get my new bed and she gets her matress back she will need to start sleeping on it, in her own room.

We'll see if that actually happens.

Hawaii

 I have always wanted to visit Hawaii.  The one thing holding me back, besides the money factor, is how I would get there.  You see, there's not enough money or medication in the world that would get me on an airplane.  I have never had the desire to get on an airplane.  In fact, the thought of having to fly terrifies me.  So, in order for me to get to Hawaii, they would need to build a bridge I could drive over.

Sure, I could probably find a cruise ship that goes from somewhere in the continental US to Hawaii, but I'm not sure how well I would good I would do on a ship in the middle of the ocean.  I like boats well enough, as long as there is land within sight.  But I have a feeling that as soon as land disappeared, I'd have some sort of panic attack.  I would probably end up getting there and then have to check out Hawaii real estate to find somewhere to live permanently, because I would have no way of getting back home.

But, living in  place this beautiful would be worth it:

 The thought of getting up every morning an putting my feet in the crystal clear water would be a dream come true.

Find Investors To Make YOur Dream Come True

 I work for a very small company.  It's so small in fact that I am the only one who can do my job, so if I ever call in sick, my boss would be in trouble.  Last week, I had to take a couple of hours off one day to register Brandi for school, and it took him a week to figure out how to get my job done without me.  I guess I could look at it as job security, but sometimes, it would be nice to have some time off during the week when businesses are open so I can get some errands done.  But, I shouldn't complain, because there are a lot of people who are out of work, and I am lucky that I even have a job.

There was a time when I would have loved to open my own business. In fact, I went to college with the hopes of one day opening my own day care center.  Anyone who knows me knows that I love me some babies.  I know it would have been a lot of hard work, find investors and start up money, but I know I would have enjoyed going to work every day.  

Some people, like me, only dream of having their own business, because they think the time is never right take that leap.  Finding smart money and applying for small business loans, and putting everything on the line can be a scary thing.  But, I don't think there is ever a right time, and if you really want something like this, you just have to do it.

Maybe someday I'll find the courage to make my dream come true.  Right now, though, I am going to continue working for my boss, who made his dreams of owning his own business come true. I need the security of a weekly paycheck.  Who knows, maybe I will find and marry a rich man someday, who will support me in chasing my dream.

Do You Play The Lottery?

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Have you ever thought about what you would do if you won the lottery?  Would you quit your job, or continue working?  Would you share your millions, or keep it all for yourself?  Or would you play paintball on an island somewhere like the guys in the video are doing?


Junior and I do not play the lottery on a regular basis, but when the jackpot is big enough, we'll buy a ticket or two.  We have yet to win, but that doesn't mean we haven't dreamed about what we would do with the money.

First, Junior would quit his job.  That's a no brainer.  Second, we would buy a house.  I don't want something big and flashy, just something big enough for me, Junior, the kids, and the cats, because I would certainly get some cats.  Third, we would pay off my mom, dad, sisters and brother's houses.

Those are the three most important things to me, but there are other things we would do.  I would convince Junior to hire me a chauffeur.  That's right.  I would want someone who would drive me where ever I wanted to go, without complaint.  I would also give money to charity.  There are a few places locally that have helped Junior and I when we needed it, and I would love to be able to give a little back.

Of course, I do not think we will ever be lucky enough to win the lottery, but it sure is nice to try once in a while.  And it doesn't hurt a thing to dream.

I Had A Weird Dream Last Night

I usually don't remember my dreams, but for some reason this one is bugging me. In my dream, I was a single mother. I don't know where Junior was; he just wasn't with me and the kids. It was weird.

I know the only way I would become a single parent is if something happens to Junior. I don't believe he would ever leave me. We have been through so much already, and made it through together. We have had money issues our whole marriage, and I have read that that is a big contributor to divorce.

Anyway, if I was to find myself suddenly single, I know I would be terrified of the thought of dating. How do people with three kids find the time to date? Where do they go to meet people? I would most likely end up on an online dating service. The problem is there are so many out there.

There is one service called West East Cafe and it's for Europeans looking for that special someone, a friend or someone to help them speak better English. Sign up is completely free, and within minutes of filling out your profile, you will show up in the results of other people's searches. If you find someone you want to connect with, you can email, instant message, or even video chat with them. I prefer the video chat, that way there aren't any surprises with what the other person looks like. I have heard that a lot of people fudge a little when describing themselves.

I hope that Junior and I are together for many, many more years, but it's nice to know there are options available where I can find someone, if that time ever comes.

Picture This

Last night, Brandi wanted to prove she was old enough to read Twilight.

She has heard Kasi and I talking about it, and was curious.

She read the first three pages, looked at me, and said "it's too hard to understand".

I guess for a 7 year old, even though she read the words correctly, it is still too mature for her.

Fast forward to 4 am this morning...

she wakes me up, crying...

she had a nightmare...

about her grandparents being vampires...

yes, you dad!...

and she tells me all about it while we lay in bed, in the dark...

I comfort her and tell her it was just a dream...

I smile...

she said not to, because in the dark, my teeth look sharp...

so what does my 4 am half a brain self do?

I respond with...

"the better to eat you with!"

not good parenting right there...

she starts really screaming...

"I'M STILL DREAMING"...

and continues screaming...

until we get out of bed and watch drake and josh, and a couple of episodes of iCarly...

at 4 am...

she is going to be dragging at school today!

I can't even write this without laughing hysterically...

I am such a bad mom! lol!

Make Your Dream A Reality

I wish I had a vacation home in an exotic country. It would have to be somewhere warm, where we could swim all day and relax together as a family. We would spend our days in the lap of luxury. Our every desire would become a reality. For me, this reality would include a gourmet chef, a maid, and maybe even room service. I would stay up late every night, and sleep in every morning. I would have the chance to escape the trials of everyday life. No school for the kids, no work for my husband, just total relaxation.

For us, this may never happen, but a girl can certainly dream.

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